Small man, Big heart

(this photo was taken in Newport, RI on our way back from Opening Retreat!)

As I type, Philadelphia is experiencing more rain than I've seen in the year I've lived here. Hurricane Hanna has struck and is leaving me stranded indoors so I figured what better time to update than on a day when there's nothing else I could be doing?
My community and I have spent the better part of the last week at the Philadelphia Water Ice Company enjoying more water ice than any three people should consume. But we were doing it all in an effort to beat the intense heat we've been having! In the last week, we went for water ice 5 times... not too bad, I say!
We've been quite busy around these parts this week... Monday we celebrated Labor Day by having a picnic and an intense volleyball game at Linden Park just outside of Philadelphia along the Delaware River. Who knew Franciscans would get so excited about playing a simple game?! In addition to volleyball, the sisters played frisbee, I tossed a football with Fr. Patrick, and we ate and ate and ate! Needless to say, I was a bit sore on Tuesday, but it was all in good fun!
Tuesday I got to try my hand at cooking in the kitchen! We made corned beef and cabbage with potatoes and carrots... in sort of a soup/stew form. I know, I don't really like it either but you make do with what you got. We had plenty of food and the meal overall went off without a hitch! Maybe this week they'll trust me to do it all by myself! :-)
After having two days off, during which I got LOTS of things done around the house, I jumped back into the coordinator role for the first time since I've been back! Everyone was well-behaved today and the volunteers that came were amazing so it was a very easy day!
On Wednesday we found out that one of our beloved guests, Darryl, passed away on Sunday. At age 43, his health has been fading drastically in the past year and it finally got the best of him. He had AIDS and emphysema, among many other severe and chronic illnesses that just overtook his tiny body. I was blessed to go to the funeral today with Karen and Fr. Michael. While it was very sad, remembering Darryl's smile and his generosity help me and hopefully his family during this difficult time. So, if you get a chance, please says prayers for Darryl and for his family, I think they could use all they can get!
On a happier note, Amanda, Noe and I participated in our first community fun night together last night! We went to a Camden Riversharks game (a very minor league baseball team across the river). It was Noe's first baseball game and we had a lot of fun singing and dancing to the music! We're really off to a great start here!!!
For those of you who continue to read my blog and send your love and prayers my way, thank you! I couldn't be here without your support!

"Welcome home..."

These are words I heard upon my return to Kensington just over a week ago from Sr. Jude. As most of you have heard by now, I have decided to stay in Philadelphia for another year. Just as things were falling into place back home, I realized that I'm not quite ready to go home yet. I felt like I was being severed from this life and I honestly felt as if I hadn't accomplished all that I wanted to during my first year here. So, I find myself back here for another year. I have two new housemates, Amanda and Noe, who are incredibly loving and supportive and who make me laugh on a daily basis. I am definitely blessed with ANOTHER great community and a supportive family back in New Hampshire who has stood by my decision since when I first brought it up.
Before I share about what I've been up to since I've been back, I should probably tell you what I was up to while I was home for three weeks. My mom and dad came to pick me up on July 26th and we went into NYC to see a show!!! We made our way home Sunday and I spent most of that week visiting friends from home. The following weekend, my mom, dad, Emily (former housemate) and I set sail for the Caribbean! We went on a week-long cruise to the Bahamas, St. Thomas and St. Maarten! It was an incredible week of relaxation that I think we were all in desperate need of! My parents were excellent benefactors of a great week!
I spent the following week packing up and saying goodbyes to friends from school and home and made my way back here on August 16th. Michael, Amanda and Noe greeted me at the airport and then we went to dinner! We served our first meal as a community Sunday morning then headed to Wareham, Massachusetts for our opening retreat!
This year the FVM program is very small; there is just my community here. It was a really intimate week with spent with each other and we got to be really comfortable really early on! It was very restful and a great way to start the year!
We jumped back into work on Friday with Amanda and I at the Inn and Noe on pickups!
I have had the warmest welcome back to this new home of mine here in Kensington. So many of the guests didn't know I was returning so they have all been happy to see me and the Team has already begun loading me with work! Yesterday I was on pickups with Amanda and we got back to the Inn after the morning pickups and Jim, one of our volunteer cooks, did not look like he was feeling well so I asked him if he wanted me to take over for him. Initially he said no but after about another hour of him being there, he decided it'd be better for him to go home. So I ended up being the head chef during the guest meal and we fed 412 people!!! Before I left in July I had made it my goal to begin being the head cook during the meals but I didn't expect it to be happening this quickly! The Team is really supportive and is going to help me prepare to do it more confidently!
We are settling in nicely to our new home... the FVMs have moved houses so the house is significantly smaller but I'm learning to adjust. I painted my room and slowly but surely we're unpacking the rest of the house. We have a beautiful enclosed porch off the back of the house along with an "office" space in the back that is surrounded by windows! We've been saying that our life isn't simple but it sure is good!
Well, I hope this update will satisfy my parents... they have been begging for updates since the middle of July! I'd like to say that I'm going to be updating more frequently but I've tried that a couple times and it hasn't worked very well. We'll see. Anyway, for those of you starting school or anything to do with school, best of luck to you and have a great year! For the rest of you, may God's peace be with you all!!!

Time flies when you're having fun...

As D-Day approaches, faster and faster it seems, our days are being filled with craziness and fun! About two and a half weeks ago, Saint Francis Inn hosted its 20-something Annual Block Party! The block party is an outdoor meal for the guests in which we close the street down, have the meal catered by Boston Market, and dance to the music of a priest-DJ all afternoon! For my first ever block party, it was incredible! I danced with guests and staff, doing the electric slide with Fr. Michael and Sr. Mary more times than I can possibly count! We served 516 people platters of roasted chicken, potato salad, corn bread, 2 cans of soda, and an ice cream sandwich! It was a great day and I'll surely be back next year!
As summer has hit, the heat is here to stay. I was hoping that heat wave from a few weeks ago was going to pass but it seems like Philadelphia holds heat better than anywhere I've ever been before! The guests are begging for deodorant and soap (soap is in great supply whereas deodorant, not so much) and I'm doing my best to accomodate their needs because when they smell, we smell them. June was a bit of a crazy month as far as numbers go, but we leveled off the last week with only one day over 400... not bad considering how long June seemed!
An update on our friend, Gary--- he seems a bit more docile these days and even managed to sweet-talk me into giving him some food at the gate. One of our favorite guests, Anibal, has gotten his hands on a recliner that he pushes all over Kensington. It has been the biggest joke of the last week or so to see Anibal with his recliner. His greeting of "Hello Miss America!" never gets old but his requests for his SSI checks each month tire us out, as no guests are allowed to receive checks at the Inn (for safety reasons for guests and staff). Despite our ongoing efforts to have his checks direct-deposited, every month we see Anibal's face and his check on the first of the month!
Emily, Maureen and I had the incredible pleasure of taking the women from the Women's Center to Clementon/Splash World Park... it's a small park in Clementon, NJ with some water rides. Sr. Xavier asked us to come along so we spent the day with some of the women from the Center. The women who go to the Women's Center are typically either active or recovering drug addicts, prostitutes, and many of which have dual diagnoses of addiction and mental illness. As I'm sure you can too, we could only imagine the trouble we were getting ourselves into with this. But the day went flawlessly and we ended up having more fun than we could've imagined with the ladies! They mostly kept their drug talk to a minimum, especially in public, and they managed to maintain somewhat civility throughout the day. It was incredible to see another aspect to these women, on a day when they have the day to enjoy themselves, to get out of the city, and to not worry about what could possibly happen to them that day.
I have begun mentoring two little girls, Bridget and Caroline (sisters, and if you've been to the Inn, you know who these girls are) for the last month or so that I am here. These girls are in desperate need of a positive female role model and for someone who doesn't succumb to their every want. I'm not really sure my efforts are fruitful yet, but I think it's going to be one of those "planting seeds" business that I heard so much in college. They are both beautiful, smart and funny little girls and I pray that their energies be used to get them out of Kensington. On all the occasions that I've spent time with the girls, they look to me and say, "Katelyn, this is the best day ever!" I just love them!
I have so much more to write, including our Six Flags adventure and some other crazy guests, but must be going now. Emily and I are heading to the shore today to soak up a day in the sun! I pray that you all are doing well! God bless!

The countdown is on...

45 days until departure. As much as my two housemates would rather not talk about it, for me it's a lot easier to prepare to leave my life here if it's not sprung upon me. I've been forcing them to talk about it for months but now that the time is actually getting to be a lot closer, it's getting easier to push the thoughts aside and really try to live in the moment. Either way, we have a very busy 6 weeks ahead of us and are making every effort to spend time together.
Summer has finally hit here in Philadelphia. We had a heat wave with 5 straight days over 95 degrees. Now I recognize that all you up in New England have experienced such heat but this heat among many people who cannot shower and who seem to be on edge even when it's a beautiful day just makes for a nutty couple of days. I've recently decided to embrace the sweat because there's no use trying to avoid it and that complaining about the heat is futile. These dang Franciscans have this idea that simplicity is the best way to go... FYI, air conditioners are NOT simple.
Just after my last post, I had two friends from school come down to visit. Marcus was my co-leader last year here in Philadelphia for Spring Break Alternative and Mike was on my SBA trip to Lawrence, MA 4 years ago. It was absolutely wonderful to have some friends from home down here to visit and to share in my ministry. I know I've said it a hundred times but I really can't express how much I appreciate when friends and family come down to share in my ministry!
Just after Marcus and Mike left I went to Atlantic City with Jamie, one of the women on the Team, and Joanne. We stayed 2 nights at Harrah's!!! Indoor pool, beautiful boardwalk, two delicious buffets, and a big flat panel tv in our room? Recipe for fun and relaxation!!! It was really nice to get away and relax although I've decided that I do not like gambling, especially when I lose money. But overall, it was a great time!
Just after Atlantic City, I went to 6 Flags in New Jersey with Beckah, my sister-in-law and her co-workers! It was a really fun day away and then she came back to Philly with me to work the meal on Sunday! It was incredible to have her come down... the next and last family member due down here is my illustrious brother. Hopefully he'll make it down before I venture back to NH.
I'm not sure if I mentioned in the last post that we had an intern here for a month from Florida, Will. Well, he was a great addition to our community, as he just fell into place. We spent a lot of time with him and we miss him as he returned to Florida to take classes and stuff.
So with all this fun, you're probably asking yourself if I ever work. Well, if you asked Fr. Michael, he would probably say no but we've actually been pretty busy around here. We had another meal of 485 the last Sunday of May but were really cranking out lots of food by the end of the month! Our efforts to be more vigilant about getting people off our street have been mostly ineffective but at least it's been relatively quiet around here. I might regret saying that later tonight when I'm trying to get to sleep but all will be well.
One of our "favorite" guests, Gary, has turned crazy. Legitimately crazy. He has been off his psych meds lately and has become particularly volatile especially within the past couple of weeks. He's usually pretty even-tempered and mild, just one of those odd ghost-like presences around here, but lately simple things have been setting him off into crazy threatening rages where he pulls whatever sharp metal object is nearby on whomever seems to cross his path. Scissors have been pulled on Fr. Michael, Judy, and Karen and just last night I saw him with a barbecue fork. Now to paint the picture a bit, Gary is homeless and sleeps on our steps here so he has absolutely no need for a barbecue fork, except to harm us or others. So in an effort to get the crazy man off our steps we called the Mobile Mental Health Unit to come examine him with the hopes of taking him away. Of course when they examined him, he did not show any signs of his true nature and they told us that he was fine. So needless to say, our friend Gary is still sleeping outside but he is indefinitely banned from the Inn until he can get treatment for his issues.
Apart from that, things are going really well! The Team is going on another retreat Thursday-Saturday so we'll be left to hold down the fort until they return and next weekend is the annual Block Party!!! I'm really excited about it and can't wait to see how it goes down! We are in the midst of planning a 6 Flags trip for some of the families that come to the Inn. I can't wait to spend the day with the kiddos at such a fun place!
Well, I guess that's all for now. I've written a lot and have to get some lunch! I hope all is well with you! Take care and God bless!

"Free chocolate chip pancakes for all!"

In a recent conversation with one of my favorite guests, Frank (not the guy who had the heart attack), we were discussing the presidential primary election that was to be taking place the next day in Pennsylvania. As was expected, Frank told me he was voting for Obama but then proceeded to tell me that he was going to write himself in on the ballot. After a bit of discussion, he told me that he'd invite me over to the White House for a big brunch with "Free chocolate chip pancakes for all"... this was Frank's way to resolve all the problems the United States currently faces. How can you not love this guy?! Oh if only it were that simple.
Since we have experienced rain for 4 days straight, both the Team and the guests were getting antsy. With high numbers so early in the month, we were waiting for the breaking point... and it came last night. Mondays never prove to be an easy day. They are long and exhausting and it seems as if all the craziness occurs on Mondays. I started the day at Benny's (the thrift store). Due to the pouring rain, it was so slow! I only made $34, a personal all-time low for me! After my shift at Benny's ended I went back to the Inn to begin making dinner for the Team as it was the FVMs' turn to cook. We chose to make burgers and fries with strawberry shortcake, a nice summer meal! I was upstairs cutting potatoes when Brother Fred came up and said Jen, one of our guests, had been stabbed and was downstairs. Jen, as you may recall from past posts, got married a year ago in Las Vegas and returned to Philadelphia with a drug habit... at least that's what I was lead to believe until yesterday. She had a large cut across her neck and on her arm and had literally been stabbed in the back with a knife. There was blood everywhere and as I held the cloth on her back to stop the bleeding, she wouldn't look me in the eyes. I held her and and sat with her until the ambulance got there. All the while her husband, Dorian, was no where to be found when she was stabbed.
Apparently Jen and Dorian had gotten into a fight earlier that afternoon because Jen was looking to "turn tricks" so she could make some money to support her habit and Dorian got upset and left. When Dorian came to the meal just about an hour later, I told him what happened to Jen... the look on his face shocked me. He seemed upset but not nearly as upset as I'd expected him to be. He told me that the reason why they were fighting was because he was sick of living on the streets and standing by Jen as he watched her slowly killing herself. He was angry, of course, but not only at the man that attacked Jen but also at Jen for putting herself at risk yet again. Jen just got out of rehab last Thursday and was back in her addiction by Monday. The last I saw Dorian, he was heading to Temple Hospital to visit Jen but I told him to get out of Kensington.
Right at the beginning of the meal, Jose, a guest who was recently banned for stealing from the Inn, came to me for a ticket to eat. As I began to explain that he was banned, Fred and Renee came to my assistance but this only aggravated Jose more. This may have been one of the few times I felt intimidated by a guest only because Jose is very mentally unstable and is capable of seriously hurting himself or any of one us. Eventually he let up on us but stood close by screaming profanities at me, Renee and basically anyone who represented charitable organizations. We attempted to call Mobile Mental Health but they didn't show up.
In conjunction with Jose's outburst, Jorge, one of our beloved, perpetually drunk guests began his own tirade in a mix of Spanish and English. It took Barbara and Sister Leslie to get him to at least get off our corner. When Jorge drinks, he typically gets violent so in an effort to avoid such a situation, we just tried to get him to leave. It worked but I fear for anyone who has crossed Jorge's path since last night.
Okay, so we have Jen, Jorge and Jose. Next up, we had a fight in the yard. Over bread. Yes, bread. I'm not entirely sure what happened but there was a lot of yelling and as I ran over to break it up, Barb and Renee came flying over and the altercation was soon dissolved. Let me just remind you that all the while, it was raining buckets and I was standing in it.
I used to find it hard to believe that all the guests would be in the same rhythm... everyone has their own beat and follows that but it seems as if there are a few days out of the year that everyone starts stepping in time and things just break down. Without hopping on my soapbox too much, I would like to point out that there were plenty of witnesses to Jen's stabbing but absolutely no one jumped to her aid. My housemates and I have been talking about this a lot lately, how the guests just don't look out for each other as I would expect them to. There are so many people here that are "friends" but would turn around and steal from their so-called friends just the same. The camaraderie is simply not there as many of our guests would probably need. I'm not sure if this is a symptom or a cause for their situations but either way, it needs to change.
And as far as the whole Jose situation goes, he tried really hard to make us feel guilty for denying a homeless man a blanket, especially on the Sabbath. Jose is not the first person to try to guilt me into helping them and as hard as it is to be strong, one of the many things I've learned this year is that we must be consistent in our assistance otherwise we get walked all over. In recent conversations with a specific guest, Richie, I have told him that if he simply respected me, I would respect him and be more inclined to work with him rather than "keeping a homeless guy down". We're taking small steps daily, Richie and I, with the hopes that we can be on the same page some day.
As the last week went on, I kept making mental notes of things to update in my blog so that's why there's such a jumble, but I wanted to be sure to give you a fair account of what's been happening down here. Thank you all for bearing with me! Love and peace to you all!!!

Oops!

It has been almost a month since my last post and I think that should be indicative of the kind of month we've had! Just after that last post our reign of visitors ended with my friend Tara coming down from Boston. The following weekend Emily went to Baltimore to visit her brothers and run her first road race while Maureen and I welcomed the quiet weekend with wide open arms!
Since that weekend, the entire Team had been anticipating the first of the month... the guests seemed particularly on guard, the numbers were astronomically high, and we were all getting ready for Volunteer Appreciation Day which was to be the following Sunday. That week, for the first time since any of the Team can remember, we had three straight days of numbers over 400... that means that at our evening meal we had over 400 people walk through our doors to eat! None of the cooks were prepared for such hoards of people and none of the staff could have possibly been ready for such chaos to ensue. As crazy as it was, however, it was a time when I could look to my co-workers and know that despite all the insanity, these people had my back in whatever decisions were made. I'm beginning to think that it's not often that people find that kind of comfort and security in their workplace so I am constantly grateful for this incredible blessing!
Every Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday evening the Team, and anyone who wants to come, goes up to the chapel for evening prayer. It is lead by different Team members each night but is really just a time to relax and unwind from the craziness of the day. When I came to Philly last year with SBA, my trip went to evening prayer but were definitely not mature enough to handle it. I didn't really like it in the beginning of the year either but have really come to appreciate how it is a time when we can all be together in our exhaustion within the presence of God. So last week at evening prayer each person that walked in slumped down in their chair, put their head back and looked completely defeated. It is days like these where you feel like you've gotten beat up... certainly not physically but definitely emotionally.
Luckily after that short stint of craziness, things died back down to normal-ish numbers for the rest of the month (somewhere around 350-375 each night). Last weekend I got to escape the crazy for a bit by going home to visit family and to accompany Marcus (a friend from school) to his senior formal. I had a wonderful time at home, my first time really being "at home" without having to see other friends in the area. The formal was lots of fun!!!
Early Sunday I went to the airport and jumped on a plane to come back to Philly just in time for Volunteer Appreciation Day! We pulled in 5 minutes before mass started and had a beautiful celebration with all those volunteers that make our ministry possible.
This past week, as school is ending for many colleges, our volunteer numbers have been really low. Since we have no groups coming, that leaves the Team to serve and bus the tables. Believe me, it's soooo much fun! In one day, I served and bussed tables and was Maitre'd. The next day I was just a server, and the following day I was on line-up (outside), Maitre'd, and busser... all in one day! As difficult as it may seem to function without volunteers, it's actually kind of fun to be on the floor with all team members. I keep explaining the meal as a big choreographed dance. Each knows their steps and their role and executes it beautifully without much confusion or mess.
As the week ends, I've been blessed with two days off in a row! I am taking advantage of the opportunity to rest and recuperate from the week and gearing up for what is to come! May brings some busy weeks/weekends but I'm really excited for all the coming activity!
God bless you all as Summer comes your way!

Just an update...

It seems as if there are many triggers around here that set people into a frenzy... nice weather, bad weather, full moons, crescent moons, the beginning of the month, the end of the month (and every other day in between), a delicious dinner at the Inn, a not-so-delicious dinner at the Inn... you get the idea. As it turns out, there doesn't seem to be any rhyme or reason to the ebb and flow of the moods and dispositions of the guests. While we can anticipate smaller numbers at the beginning of the month, a yard of 225 people can feel the same as when the yard is full of people if you have just one or two "crazy" people in it.
We've been revisited by "Head Phones Rodney," a man who doesn't really believe he is part of this world, nor really part of any world. He likes to "listen" to headphones that I'm not entirely sure play music. He speaks in a very deep almost robot-like voice that is very difficult to understand. He seems pretty harmless but when you get him excited, it's hard to control him.
Since Monday I've had to call 911 twice. Monday a woman came into the yard whom no one recognized and plopped herself against the fence. She was not really responding to Emily and wouldn't give us any information. Just 30 minutes ago, a regular guest of ours was laying on the front steps of one of the houses the Inn owns. She looked gray-ish (definitely not a good sign) and wasn't responding to Fred. Fortunately in both instances the ambulance came quickly but that is not always the case around these parts.
Saturday afternoon my friend Jen and I went down to the Inn to pick something up and we were met by Anna Mae, a beloved non-guest at the Inn (she doesn't ever eat at the Inn, she just hangs out in front) who was expressing concern for a man in a motorized wheelchair. Anna Mae, although can be hard to work with at times, is actually really sweet and caring and looks out for people around the block. This man just appeared on our front steps Saturday morning with four suitcases and very little English-speaking ability. Anna Mae asked me to call for help because she was afraid that he was going to get hurt. After talking with him, I was able to put together that he was looking for a shelter. I called Outreach Services, a Philadelphia agency that comes to pick up at-risk people and brings them to shelters in the area. Well Outreach told me that they could bring the man but could not transport his wheelchair. I was ordered to call the police, have them meet Outreach at the Inn so that they could simply pick the chair up and put it in Outreach's vehicle. Sounds a little crazy, doesn't it? So I called the police, they agreed to come help, then I called Outreach back but they had already dispatched their team to another issue.
After about 15 minutes, Outreach arrived, angry with me that the police were not there and angry with our wheelchair-bound friend because he couldn't speak English. We ended up getting a man from The Last Stop (the recovery house across the street) to come over and translate for us. The man's story didn't really make much sense, even to the man who could speak Spanish (which made me feel better about my Spanish-speaking skills), but he still needed some place to sleep. Finally, a transport service agency came and brought the man to a shelter that many of our guests stay at and we haven't heard from him since. The police never showed up to help. I try not to get discouraged and continually tell myself that they are very busy, especially around these parts, but if they are here to "protect and serve," they need to be doing a better job.
In other news, we've been blessed with some beautiful weather! My housemates and I are planning to plant a garden in the back yard to supply us with some fresh veggies for the summer and I can't wait to get out there and get to work, the hard part is finding the time to do so. My friend Tara is visiting this weekend from Boston and I'm really excited!!!
No further developments as far as what the plan is for next year yet. I have put the issue on the back burner for awhile in hopes that suddenly it will all become clear but I think that's wishful thinking. I am going to seriously start exploring my options within the coming weeks and will hopefully be able to pin down something soon. Keep my community and the discernment process in your prayers, we all need it!